For 2020 I picked a word. This word is a word that I was believing God would show more of himself through and for me to learn more about that word. The word I picked was Stewardship and boy did this word rock my world! Ultimately, stewardship prepared me for the hard yes(es) and the hard no(s):
Yes God I will move forward with the vision you put in me even though I still wonder why you picked me. Yes I will trust that you will save my little brother’s life. Yes I will decide to fast and pray and forsake what I think. Yes I will serve even in the midst of the unveiling and extreme tension of racial injustice. Yes I do believe you. No I cannot do that tonight bc I have to study.
No I cannot heal your pain of losing a loved one but I can just be here when you need an ear.
No I cannot take that opportunity bc what He’s calling me into requires time and attention.
No I do not need that when faced with something I really want.
No I do not know if my client ever survived stage 5 cancer because I never saw her again but I trust that the Lord will continue to cover her family and my heart.
I have never had so much of an undoing and making season in my life. I thought stewardship would be about money management. While this was partially true and level 1 of what would happen this year, God was about to take me through so many different levels of trusting that it ALL belongs to Him. Since it all belongs to Him, my decisions had to line up with that truth. I can honestly say that while I didn’t win every battle, I believe I won the war of little faith. I won the war in my mind that doubted just a little that God would take care of my “small” just as much as my “big” worries... not just cover it but really take care of it. Sure, He covers every scar but He cares enough to heal it too. He's just that good!
What are some “big” or “small” things that you believe God has delivered you from this year and what are some things that you are believing Him for in 2021? Comment below.
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